ROSTERBATION! Let's get the band back together again!!!

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rockycola
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ROSTERBATION! Let's get the band back together again!!!

Post by rockycola » Fri Sep 27, 2024 10:47 pm

Kicks & Giggles time.

Kind of off topic but this fits into a comical catastrophic off-season plan.

Trade away the whole Fantastic Five pitching staff. Get some bats!

Lookit this list of former Mariner free agent starting pitchers. Welcome them back with open arms. Pay 'em discounted salaries
cause you know they want to come home :D

Matthew Boyd (34)
Yusei Kikuchi (34)
Chris Flexen (30)
Drew Smyly (36)
Anthony DeSclafani (35)
Marco Gonzales (33)
Wade Miley (38)
Robbie Ray (33) (has opt out clause)

Think of the haul we could get for Kirby, Castillo, Gilbert, Miller and Woo!!!!! Bats, bats and more bats!. We'll score lots and lots of runs and give up lots and lots of runs.

Who are your replacement 5? The fans in the stands won't know the diff because they're familiar names.

I got this demented brainstorm looking at MLBTR's today.
Rocky Colavito is a Hall of Famer in my book!

Pharmabro
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Re: ROSTERBATION! Let's get the band back together again!!!

Post by Pharmabro » Sat Sep 28, 2024 4:29 am

Munoz time?


Wrong thread.
Last edited by Pharmabro on Sat Sep 28, 2024 4:39 am, edited 1 time in total.

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rockycola
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Re: ROSTERBATION! Let's get the band back together again!!!

Post by rockycola » Sat Sep 28, 2024 4:39 am

Pharmabro wrote:
Sat Sep 28, 2024 4:29 am
Munoz time?
This thread of mine went over like a lead balloon. Sort of like the Mariner season.
Posting absurdity like this was therapeutic, at least for me.
Rocky Colavito is a Hall of Famer in my book!

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Sibelius Hindemith
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Re: ROSTERBATION! Let's get the band back together again!!!

Post by Sibelius Hindemith » Mon Oct 07, 2024 10:29 pm

I appreciate the research you did and think your plan could result in the first team to score and/or allow 1000 runs. The entertainment value would certainly be higher.

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rockycola
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Re: ROSTERBATION! Let's get the band back together again!!!

Post by rockycola » Mon Oct 07, 2024 11:11 pm

Sibelius Hindemith wrote:
Mon Oct 07, 2024 10:29 pm
I appreciate the research you did and think your plan could result in the first team to score and/or allow 1000 runs. The entertainment value would certainly be higher.
That's what I'm talking about. Thanks for resurrecting my demented, dead thread.
Think of all the 15-14 wins and losses.....
Rocky Colavito is a Hall of Famer in my book!

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bpj
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Re: ROSTERBATION! Let's get the band back together again!!!

Post by bpj » Mon Oct 07, 2024 11:35 pm

I feel like a 70 year old without any viagra in regards to this team after their statements.

Hard to put a lot of effort into thinking about it when we know they suck at what they do.

Big_Maple
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Re: ROSTERBATION! Let's get the band back together again!!!

Post by Big_Maple » Tue Oct 08, 2024 4:35 pm

bpj wrote:
Mon Oct 07, 2024 11:35 pm

Hard to put a lot of effort into thinking about it when we know they suck at what they do.
I spent a few days trying to put together offseason plans. This year I tried to zero in on what I thought they would do based on comments from Jerry and Stanton as opposed to what I would do if I were running the show.

At the end of the day I decided it was all too depressing to even think about. They're just going to go out and get a bunch of bottom-of-the-dumpster Garvers and Hummels and Kolten Wongs because they need cheap, warm bodies in uniforms and nothing else.

Next year, Juan Soto and Alex Bregman and Blake Snell and Willy Adames will lead their teams to wild cards, and division titles and world series playoffs while we set around and congratulate ourselves on how much money we saved, and how happy JP Crawford is because we didn't hurt his feelings by forcing him to play second base.

My, oh my.

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bpj
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Re: ROSTERBATION! Let's get the band back together again!!!

Post by bpj » Tue Oct 08, 2024 7:56 pm

Big_Maple wrote:
Tue Oct 08, 2024 4:35 pm
bpj wrote:
Mon Oct 07, 2024 11:35 pm

Hard to put a lot of effort into thinking about it when we know they suck at what they do.
I spent a few days trying to put together offseason plans. This year I tried to zero in on what I thought they would do based on comments from Jerry and Stanton as opposed to what I would do if I were running the show.

At the end of the day I decided it was all too depressing to even think about. They're just going to go out and get a bunch of bottom-of-the-dumpster Garvers and Hummels and Kolten Wongs because they need cheap, warm bodies in uniforms and nothing else.

Next year, Juan Soto and Alex Bregman and Blake Snell and Willy Adames will lead their teams to wild cards, and division titles and world series playoffs while we set around and congratulate ourselves on how much money we saved, and how happy JP Crawford is because we didn't hurt his feelings by forcing him to play second base.

My, oh my.
They've sucked the fun out of it.

They've taken the goodwill they gained from signing Robinson Cano and absolutely curbstomped that mfer.

And 95% of the limp wristed fanbase just eats it up.

Big_Maple
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Re: ROSTERBATION! Let's get the band back together again!!!

Post by Big_Maple » Tue Oct 08, 2024 8:33 pm

bpj wrote:
Tue Oct 08, 2024 7:56 pm
curbstomped that mfer.
I don't know if you saw American History X, but that's exactly what I thought of with this metaphor. :(

Vogelbomb
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Re: ROSTERBATION! Let's get the band back together again!!!

Post by Vogelbomb » Thu Oct 10, 2024 4:51 am

yeah, Robbie Ray is going to opt out of a $23m contract after TJ surgery. Good one

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